Getting Back On The Horse (Metaphorically, not an actual torture horse...)

This weekend some friends of ours decided to hold a one year anniversary party and they asked Tori if it could be held at her house, so Tori became a co-host of the party. Naturally, as her slave, this meant I did a lot of work helping prepare for it, including moving furniture, setting up toys and so on. In all, something like 25 people were present, and all seemed to have a good time.

Later on during the party, it was my turn to be put into the swivel "Fantasy Rack". Tori strapped me in, chained my wrists down and blindfolded me. Then left to get implements to work on me, leaving me there (being watched by others, just in case).

Now, I've written in the past about two of the hardest to take things we've done; Tabasco and the Wartenburg Wheel (also mentioned here). Well, you can guess what toys she started to use on me. Initially she dropped Tabasco on my penis, but since it was outside I felt nothing... then one drop made it inside my foreskin. She changed position and a second drop made it inside. OK, I knew this wasn't going to be good. Then she started on the me with the Wartenburg Wheel and (as I was later told) a knife. This had exactly the opposite effect to what was intended. As the pain in my penis started to build I felt myself getting annoyed. Damned annoyed. I needed to curl up around myside and cuddle and stroke my poor penis hoping to (futile, I know) reduce the pain.

But I couldn't; I was strapped down and Tori was irritating me with the Wartenburg.

Tori noticed this pretty quickly and stopped; asked if I was OK and I thought and honestly replied "No," and explained the problem. She released me and took me upstairs to her bedroom (which had been marked out-of-bounds for general party play). There I curled up and cried.

It then hit me... this is the second consecutive party we'd been to where our public play had aborted because I was unable to handle it. I felt like shit; once again I had failed Tori in public. Damnit! I sobbed this out to Tori, who was already distressed and crying, and she broke down, feeling like a failure; 15 years of playing and she still couldn't do a scene properly! I asked the rhetorical question... just how many times had she put Tabasco on a man's penis? No answer, but I felt the point had hit home; no matter how many times you play each scene is unique, with it's own problems and issues.

Eventually we both cried ourselves out and started talking. Maybe we were just trying to do too much at a time because of the limited amount of public play we do. Our private scenes normally work wonderfully! I reminded Tori if what had just taken place earlier that week, and wondered if she considered that a failure; obviously she could do a scene properly! It's only been the last two times in public that we've had problems.

I wanted to bolster Tori's confidence and my own; I wanted us to retry the scene, but without the Tabasco. I felt confident that this would work. Tori agreed, so we went down and started again. The blindfold had been left upstairs, so I got to see a little of what she had coming, but I spent a lot of the time with my eyes closed, struggling and jerking and making lots of anguished noises as she used her tools to tickle and torment me. No heavy play; no whips, no crops... all light sensation; nearly all tickle! I didn't actually make it into sub-space this time, but I was in bottom space. I'm not sure I can explain the difference... I was more verbal, more talking back to Tori.

Maybe the resulting scene wasn't as intense as the one initially envisaged, and it wasn't as sexually stimulating, but it was a successful scene and I enjoyed myself. Talking with Tori afterwards, she was also glad we "got back on the horse" and tried again.

We learnt a few things that night. I think, in future, we should take extra care in our public play to take things slower than normal and to not be too ambitious :-)